MamaBlogger365 – #HAIKU #MOTHER by @elenaskoko

When I use my fingers, the food is warm and tastes like mother.

Smells like freshly made rosetta, tastes like crème brulée. My baby.

For a moment I didn’t think of you. I felt guilty. How could I forget for a minute alone that I have you and you have me?

When we leave the place where you were happy, will you blame me?

“Home is where you’ve got your stuff.” My mom. She packed all my stuff in boxes when I left.

My body is tired. My baby is crying. She needs me every second of her open eyes. I am here, I am your ship, have no fear.

I am the guardian of your sleep. Now, sleep sleep sleep…

My baby knows food is good for her health. She takes it in homeopathic doses.

I have a tip for a goodnight sleep. Give her a tit and she’ll fall in a bit. Add a kiss for a sweet bliss.

My one-year-old pulled up her t-shirt and offered me her breast. I kissed it and we both laughed.

I went to my mother. I gave her my child and collapsed. Now I could. She gave the baby to grandpa and held me in her arms all night.

Silence after six. My baby sleeps. Only the crisp sound of a keyboard.

Toddle, my creature, toddle. The world is yours.

I am here, as I was here, and I’ll always be. If I leave, I’ll be back. With you forever. Now, would you please stop crying?

How fascinating is human nature! Within myself I make food for my baby, as much as she needs, as long as she wants.

I look at you. I’m watching you. I see you.

13 months to come, but when she sleeps sucking on her thumb, she still looks like a little fetus in my womb.

I confess: I check out if she breathes every time she naps more than one and a half hour. She breathes.

There are guilty no no days. Today.

I put her in her little bed, suffered in silence for a while, then put her back in our big bed.

Quietly, I sneak out of the bed, walk out of the room on the tip of my toes, then keep quietly digiting. Nap silence.

Bio: Elena Skoko is a singer, artist and mom. She is the author of “Memoirs of a Singing Birth” and frontwoman of Bluebird & Skoko band. Her tweet poetry project #HAIKU #MOTHER tries to capture the beauty of child’s metamorphosis in time, the subtle mother and child relationship, and many little everyday things that have the power to reach deep inside with piercing greatness. They are like sudden bites of ecstasy that she shares in form of tweets. Follow her @elenaskoko and visit her website for more information. She will present her memoirs at MAMA EXPO conference.

Support MamaBlogger365 and help the Museum of Motherhood secure a permanent home in 2011!

Photo credit: Mother And Baby by Anna Cervova; author photo courtesy of author.

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