MamaBlogger365 – How Happy Are You Really? by Julie Donley, RN

During my assessment reviews with coaching clients, I always ask the question about happiness – are you happy?

Sometimes, people say yes and sometimes no. Many people think they are happy when in fact, they are not. This can often come as a revelation and it’s important because we cannot change what we are unaware of.

What’s amazing, however, is that far too many people are UNHAPPY.

One place on the assessment in particular demonstrates a person’s level of happiness. So let me ask you this key question, before I explain:

In any given moment, do you spend your time thinking about what you could be doing or should be doing? Or are you able to simply enjoy whatever you are doing in this moment?

For example, when you are at work, you think about being home; when you’re at home you think about work. When you’re in a meeting, you’re thinking about what to say or what’s for dinner. On Monday you wish it were Friday. And if you have problems at home, you want work to never end. You get the picture.

When you spend your time thinking about other things you are not present. You’re not HERE; you’re THERE. And you cannot be happy.

You cannot enjoy what you are not present to take pleasure in.

Learning to focus your attention on whatever you are doing at this moment is a crucial step to happiness. BUT FIRST, you need to be aware of your thoughts and how they distract you from enjoying and engaging in the moment. This is one reason the assessment I use with coaching clients is so powerful because it gives you insight into your distracting (and your empowering) thoughts.

Pay attention to your thoughts and whenever they drift, bring yourself back.

When you are at work, be at work. Enjoy using your talents and the relationships you create with colleagues.

When you are home, enjoy your family, your house, your stuff. Revel in the life you are living.

If you cannot, if you are troubled or have difficulty, then take action! Don’t accept situations that you cannot find joy in. Only you have the power to change your situation.

Often, it’s you who need to change – your thoughts, your attitude, and your approach to people, places and things. Start with YOU. If you only seek to change the situation, then you will find yourself in a new situation with the same problems. YOU GO WITH YOU WHEREVER YOU GO. So your problems come with you.

If you do all you can to make your situation better and it still is not working, then you can take action to change the circumstances. But YOU will have changed. You will be better and improve in the process so your new circumstances will be different.

Every moment of your life is a gift. You make choices about how to spend your time. Respect yourself by choosing to do what is of value to you and then allowing yourself to be fully present to enjoy it. This is where happiness lives.

“What can I do right now that would be of greatest value to me?” Then do it and BE PRESENT to enjoy it.

Need help? Contact me for a free assessment and/or a free coaching session. Why wait?

To your success in health, wealth and love,
Julie Donley, RN ~ Nurturing Your Success

Bio: Julie Donley, MBA, BSN, RN is a psychiatric nurse, success expert and author of several empowering and motivating books including Does Change have to be so H.A.R.D.? and The Journey Called YOU: A Roadmap to Self-Discovery and Acceptance. Julie is named one of the top 100 thought leaders in personal development. For self-help resources and to learn more, visit Media can access her online press kit at

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Photo credit: Fruit Smile by Petr Kratochvil

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